Please take notice

I don't want to cause anyone to fall asleep here so I'll get this party started by telling you some stuff about me that you won't get to see in my "extended profile." I come from an extremely well-rounded family. My mother and father are still married after almost 30 years. I am the baby sister of two older brothers and I couldn't have been happier having it any other way. I'm Roman Catholic and since I've become more of an "adult," I've strayed from the whole Church scene. I can't even really tell you why. Forgive me for saying this but, I found mass to be boring the older I got. Which seems strange because when you're a child you're obviously not comprehending all that's being said at mass. Your mind is more often than not wandering to thoughts of playing on the swing set when you get home. But it's true- mass became boring. Plus, I began developing my own opinions of religion. Don't get me wrong, I still pray quite regularly through out the day, most often before I go to sleep at night. I feel guilty sometimes asking God for things, simply because I don't take an hour out of my week to attend mass, like I was taught my whole life. Honestly though, I feel that even if certain beliefs and ideas are instilled in our minds as children, no matter what, exposure to life as we get older will cause us to do the opposite of what was taught. Unfortunately, sometimes that leads to making decisions that aren't always what's best for us. At any rate, I still believe in God, I still believe in all the good things he does for me, and some day, when it's right for me, I will return to mass.
Are you still there???
I've been feeling sort of moody lately and it's been difficult to pinpoint any explanations for it. I graduated with an associates degree in communications last December and right after graduation I moved to South Carolina to be with my boyfriend who was trying to finish school down there. I won't tell you everything about that, but I will tell you the whole move changed my life forever. No longer was I living under the shelter of my parents. I wasn't even doing it in a place semi-close to home. I made the choice when he graduated this past December that I would move back to New York with him. I used to rattle the reasons right off my tongue as to why that was a good idea- moving back home that is. Now those reasons are becoming more and more hard to say. In my opinion, I took steps backwards by moving back to New York. All in the name of love.....? I'm back in my parents house, I'm back to waiting tables...back back back. I guess I just stated the explanation to my moodiness.
You're getting the impression I'm a bitter person. I'm not, I love life and I know what it takes to make me happy, sometimes, it's just a matter of actually doing what it takes that makes me one moody little B****.

More later......

And we're off....

How should I even begin?? I should tell you that I thoroughly enjoy writing, about what, I'm not too sure. Whatever comes to me I gather. The simple idea of my thoughts possibly affecting someone else in a positive (or even negative) way kind of makes me smile. So I guess you could say that's why I chose to start my blog. This won't be one of those cases where "if you don't have anything nice to say don't say it at all." What I mean is, I look forward to any sort of criticism or thoughts anyone may have about what I choose to say in here, so lay it on me.
The times I've sat down and written in my personal journal, or "diary," if you will, are few and far between. That is because I lack the self confidence needed to actually like what I write, so I don't share my thoughts very often-with others- or even with myself. Once it's written, I rarely read it again. Hell, I'm not even sure I like what I'm saying right now! So I'm sure you've decided at this point that I'm strange and that I don't make much sense. I said I thoroughly enjoyed writing yet I don't do it often because I'm afraid what I say sounds stupid. I won't bore you with explanations right now, I'll just say that you'll hopefully have me figured out in the upcoming blogs, because if you do--you're already steps ahead of me.

Thanx--
Beth